Category Archives: Parenting

Countdown to Move-In Day Thoughts

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I had some nice time with just Kimmi this past weekend and was glad.  I’m still bracing myself for the adjustment to her being away from home and “klotzfive” changing to “klotzfour” for a while at home.  All weekend I found myself sighing and thinking things like, “oh, this is her last Sunday singing on worship team at church for a while”, “this is her last weekend at home”, “look at her room empty and all packed up”, etc.  Then I could just imagine her thinking those same thoughts but with a different perspective:  “Yes!  My last weekend at home for a while,” “Room packed up and ready to go – yes!”  I keep trying to remember how I felt at her age and when I was about to go to college at AU.  I had no sad thoughts, only excitement for getting out on my own.  My parents lived in Anderson so it wasn’t a long distance, sad departure for me.  I was ready and glad!

Two more days…I think with mixed emotions, quietly
Two more days!!  Kimmi must be thinking with a big smile on her face

More thoughts from the front row

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Nothing teaches you about God’s nature as a heavenly father like being a parent.  I have learned so much through the different stages of life we’ve experienced so far about his patience, his unconditional love, his desires for us to “succeed” and win, his devotion, his delight in us, his eagerness to protect and guide us, and more.

frontrowEver since my first little baby girl was born I’ve had the privilege of a front row seat.  God graciously invited John and I to be co-directors in the continuing saga of their lives.  It’s been challenging, exciting, funny, sad, frustrating, exhausting, joyful, disappointing, humbling, and wonderful.  No shortage of dramatic girls for the roles of the three daughters in this story.

About 7-8 years ago the scene began changing as we entered the teen phase of parenting.  It started off so smoothly we smugly thought we had it made.  “Piece of cake!  What’s the big deal everyone’s always talking and whining about?  It’s not that different than the last scene.”  And really, compared to many we do have it made.  Our girls are a delight to us, make us proud, fill our lives so much that we don’t want to imagine what it would be like without them.  The last few years have become a bit more challenging however – Continue reading →

Not so Desirable Front Row Seat

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harry-potter-poster_330x508It seems almost everyone is talking about the new Harry Potter movie, “The Half-Blood Prince” based on J.K. Rowling’s sixth book in the series.  I’ve read all the books and as usual, I think the book is so much better.  The movie is entertaining, for sure, but so much had to be left out and several liberties taken with original story.  [SPOILER WARNING – if you haven’t read the book or seen the movie yet and plan to, don’t read on]

At the end of the story, Death Eaters (the bad guys) have made their way into the previously secure school Hogwarts.  Draco, a student who has become a death eater, has been charged by the dark lord, Voldemort, with the task of killing the head master, Dumbledore.  He’s made several feeble attempts that failed but now has found Dumbledore in a tower (Harry & Dumbledore had just returned from a dangerous quest in another place) and stands with his wand pointed at him, poised to kill.  In the movie, before Draco gets there, Dumbledore tells Harry to run and get a professor and not to come back up to the tower under any circumstances.  Harry starts downstairs but then, hearing what’s happening, stays a floor underneath watching and listening.  He doesn’t run back up to help Dumbledore because He gave his word not to.

In the book, Harry turns to go get the professor and hears Draco come up to the tower where they are.  Before he can turn to say anything or help, Dumbledore wordlessly casts a spell that immobilizes him.  Harry stands under his invisibility cloak, stiff as a statue, leaning up against the wall, an unwilling spectator, unable to move or speak.  Dumbledore talks Draco down so he almost gives up and gives in, but the other death eaters reach the tower including the professor Harry was supposed to fetch.  Harry watches with horror, powerless, as the professor who was supposed to help actually raises his wand pointed at Dumbledore Continue reading →

Unplugged

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Did you hear it?  The wails of three teenagers echoing across the entire state of Indiana when we told them we were having an “unplugged” no cell phone, no facebook trip to see their grandparents in NY this weekend?

John and I decided we’re going to leave cell phones at home (except for his in case of emergency) and not allow anyone on facebook either.  It’s only for five days but you would have thought we asked each of the girls to personally cut off their own arms and forever live in caves as hermits.

We live in a deluge of input, information, communication, entertainment, and technology and it seems to have caused American Christians to become spiritually malnourished, weak, subtly distracted and preoccupied.   I have to admit I have allowed it to make me that way.   When was the last time I sat down just to be quiet?  How about an evening without turning on the TV or sitting down in front of the Internet?  How about going for a walk outside and not taking the iPod?  Continue reading →

mishmash

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This morning I have so many thoughts, lessons, convictions swirling around in my mind I felt a little overwhelmed as I drove into work.  I talked with God about it but thought it would also help me to put some of them in writing.

I laid out a beautiful sermonette to John last night about how we need to trust the girls and God during these teen years when we can’t really control what happens and we oftentimes have to just sit, watch and pray.  Then today I woke feeling anxious.  God rewound the tape from my “message” last night and played it back right in front of me – the nerve!  Living by my own words is tough today.

If I really trusted Him completely I wouldn’t worry.  So, I’m practicing faith and trust, leaning on Him even though I still feel uncertain.  Sometimes letting go hasn’t been that hard but there are days…

What if my daughters choose ways and lifestyles other than what I hope for them?  Continue reading →

A Changin’

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In the words of my daughter Kaitlin this evening, after we attended camp meeting and I only saw two people I know (!) “Mom, times, they are a changin’ “.  What a true statement.   It’s especially true for me as a mom of three teenagers.

Mimi and girls

It used to be that wherever I went during the day or on the weekends, all three girls piled into the car or van with me, we’d listen to music, sing, laugh, be silly and pal around.  Nowadays they’re usually at work, busy, out with friends, texting friends and boyfriends, on a date, or otherwise occupied.  We have a lot fewer dinners around the table when everyone is present.  It used to always be the “Klotzfive” out on the town.  Now sometimes it’s the “Klotzfour” “Klotzthree” or…gasp…”Klotztwo” – me and John!  Today I went to the pool by myself and had to talk myself out of a pity party.   Continue reading →

Soar New Ravens Soar!

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Kimmi with her new laptop!

Kimmi with her new laptop!

We’re home now from our weekend at Anderson University and Kimmi is officially an AU Raven!  She signed up for classes, got her ID picture taken, met new friends, bought a t-shirt and hasn’t stopped smiling since we left the campus.   I got to see several friends of mine that I’ve known since I was in college who work on campus as faculty and that was fun.  There are a lot of good people there – that makes me even more confident in sending my girls into their care for a few years.   During the parent session this morning the admissions staff had each of us tell our name, where we’re from, the name of our child, their major and what made them choose AU.

The overwhelming majority said their student felt welcomed when coming to campus, felt special, received individual special attention from the admissions staff and friendliness from current students.  It just goes to show that a warm, welcoming environment and intentionally making others feel like they really matter goes a long way.  I’m proud to be a Raven alum.  I kinda wish I could do college again – 4 of the best years of my life!

One of the presenters told the kids that over their high school years they grew a lot physically and changed a lot in that way, but that during the next four years they will change so much on the inside.  How true and how beautiful!  It will be exciting to watch the unfolding of Kimmi’s future and the shaping God does in her heart and life.

I came home to our downstairs full of stuff from our upstairs – what a mess!  We are fighting off some bedbugs.  I’m almost embarrassed to admit it but it’s true.  I guess they can show up anywhere these days but it always makes me think of people who live in squallor.  We don’t, I promise!  We did have to throw away two boxsprings, are washing and drying all bedding and clothes from the rooms where they were found, and super cleaning the floors.  I wonder why God even created bed bugs!  Seriously.  What purpose can they serve?  They bite us to get our blood, they don’t help anyone, they’re not even cute.   One good thing coming out of this mess for us is the super cleaning our apartment is getting as a result.  An exterminator came and steamed everything, which is apparently one of the only things that will kill the little pests.  I know we’re supposed to thank God for EVERYTHING so I told him the other day “thank you for bed bugs.”  Did He say we have to be sincere when we thank him for the not so lovely things in life?

All in all – we still are so blessed with more than we need.  Today we have had enough of everything and we always have God.  Hopefully we will have no more bedbugs!

Fly Butterfly

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blue-morpho-butterfly-518617-ga

I drove out of Anderson to go home tonight and was surprised at the lump in my throat.  Kimmi’s staying overnight at the SOAR weekend at college, scheduling classes tomorrow, getting officially ready to start this fall.  We’re one step closer to her moving out, gradually shifting from one stage of family to the next.  Thankfully we’ll have several years to adjust as the other two move through high school and beyond.  Watching Kimmi graduate was fun and exciting but surreal.  Wow.  We’re really here, she’s really 18, life really is moving on.

It’s another reminder to me to live in today and enjoy what’s going on right now.  I’m determined not to get too emotional and miss the fun of this weekend for my girl.  Nicole C. Mullen wrote a song I love about moms blessing their daughters as they go out into the world.  The lyrics go like this: Continue reading →

Kimmi, Kimba, Kimberly, Kimmi-kimmi-koco-bop

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kimmiToday my first-born is going to walk across her high school gymnasium’s platform and accept her diploma. She is passing a milestone in her life and we get to watch her do it! I’ll watch with pride but I’m also feeling disbelief that we’re actually at this stage of life, curiosity about how our family dynamics will change now that we’re moving slowly out of the Klotzfive at home scene, sadness that she’ll be increasingly on her own and less a part of my daily life, and thankfulness for her bright mind and healthy body – that God has brought her this far and blessed her.

As I look back in my mind over Kimmi’s life I remember when she was so eager to read and write that she copied words from toys and books onto a little notebook we gave her. We found it one day with lots of scribbling but then very leglibly on one line the words “Made in China.”

She embraced school, reading, art, music, projects, friends, class plays, physical fitness tests and field days, and the whole sha-bang with joy.

I think it’s a natural tendency to compare our kids to ourselves when we were their age, but I’ve seen in Kimmi so many beautiful differences from when I was in school. She’s developed a real love for literature, especially Shakespeare. Rather than being saturated with music classes like I was, her loves have been reading, art, tennis, writing and most recently photography.

I’m not sure how I’ll react tonight at the graduation ceremony. I don’t know if I’ll get teary-eyed or just try to stay in my seat with an adrenaline rush of excitement at her accomplishment and bright future. There will be lots of video and picture taking, that’s for sure. To top it off her sister will be following right behind next year, barely giving John and I a breather from this life-changing phase we’re in.

Here’s to you, Kimmi, Kimba, Kimbalina, Kimberly-girl: We’re so proud of you and know God has some beautiful plans for your life! We let go, we trust you, we trust God to take care of you and guide you. We will always be here for you and will ALWAYS cover you in prayer. Congratulations, Kimberly Ellen Klotz! WOO!!

My mom, my friend

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img_0614I just enjoyed a few days with my mom.  She came over to visit since my girls are on spring break so I took two days off work.  We saw a movie, shopped ’til we dropped (groceries and the mall), ate some M & M’s and ice cream, drank diet cokes & coffee, and just relaxed.  My favorite part of the visit was when we had breakfast together at Bob Evans one morning, not because of the yummy omelet and pancake, but because of the heartfelt open conversation.

One of my mom’s famous lines when I was a teenager was “I’m your mom, so I can’t always be your friend.”  In other words, “I’m laying down the law here whether you like me or not.  We’re not gonna be buddies right now.”  It was the right thing to do and I’ve told my girls that quite a few times myself.  They just love it.

Thankfully that’s only true for a while.  Once I got married and began my life with John the relationship changed a little.  We were more friends than mom and daughter, though I still felt like her little girl.  When I became a mom myself, all sorts of light bulbs went on in my head as I experienced the joys and trials of raising little ones.  “Ohhhhh – now I see why she said that or did that.”  As the years go by, I’ve become more and more comfortable just being my mom’s friend.   The roles have changed.  I’m not the self-centered teenager I used to be.  I actually see that my mom has needs, has hurts, has things she wants and needs to talk about.  She wants to share joys and answers to prayer and have me rejoice with her.  It never occurred to me before when my mind was preoccupied with dating, doing my own thing, and arguing with her about curfews.  I forgot that my mom and dad were people, too, not just parents.  Imagine that!

As we sat and visited the other day, my eyes were opened a little bit more to the hurts my mom has trudged through and how God has ministered to her heart.   Continue reading →