Tag Archives: faith

Got hope?

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I don’t think anyone would argue with me when I say the inhabitants of this world are weary and in need of hope. All throughout the history of mankind it has been that way since the very beginning when people decided to pick their way over God’s way and God let them.

I believe there is still hope to be had. And that’s not just me being optimistic. (although I am pretty optimistic and can be annoyingly so)

Psalms 130: 6 says, “I wait for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning.” I have long thought that verse meant that the watchmen were tired and eager for their shift to end, so they were watching for the sun to finally peek it’s welcome glowing face over the horizon so they could clock out and go home. Recently I heard another perspective: they watch for the sun to rise because every day the sun rises. They are watching and waiting for it to happen because they know it’s going to happen. They can count on it.

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A new way to look at it

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I’m a firstborn, and therefore (like many of us firstborns) mostly compliant, a people pleaser, and a perfectionist. My personality likes rules because they provide structure. Structure makes me feel secure and comfortable.  I was raised in a church-going, Bible-believing family and it was all black and white to me. This is right, that’s wrong. Do what’s right, not what’s wrong. Being a Christian, as I came to understand it, was mostly about this. I wanted to do a really great job of following the rules and living the right way so God (and my parents) would be happy with me. I think I gravitated toward and settled into this mindset in part because of my nature of people pleasing and perfectionism.

I didn’t realize until adulthood, and more and more these last 10 years or so, how my view of a life of faith was incomplete and restrictive, restricting me more than just in the way I behave. My relationship with God has been hampered by this lingering feeling that I better not mess up. I’d painted Him in my mind as the boundary maker, the Judge, the Holy One I desperately don’t want to disappoint by stepping out of line.

I was trying to thrive in a legalistic faith (and it wasn’t working) instead of having a deeply personal and transformative 24/7 relationship with a living, loving Father.

I’m learning, or relearning, how to live in relationship with God because a relationship built only on rules and do’s & don’ts is a pretty cold one. Its foundation is fear and that has often pushed me back from God. Think about it, is a God who is judging, keeping track of wrongs, and watching for a mistake One who seems approachable and warm? Is that someone you’d want to spend a lot of time with, talk with, listen to, read about, follow, or even share with other people?

There are lots of illustrations out there about living God’s way. Here’s one: Picture a house with a big yard that backs up to a major highway. The yard is fenced so the children who live in the house won’t wander or run onto the road and be hurt or killed. Similarly, God’s boundaries are for our good, they keep us from harm and ultimately from death (you know, the wages of sin is death kind of death).

Recently, God gave me a new way to look at that. Imagine a wide open, vast, lush, green grassy plain with lots of rolling hills in the distance, the landscape stretching as far as your eye can see. In the distance you can hear the gurgling of a creek or distant thundering of waterfalls. The sky is wide and blue, the sun shining, a refreshing breeze blows the hair away from your face. Here and there, however, spotting the landscape are dark circles, which when you look closer you realize are deep holes. They’re each encircled with a fence to keep people from wandering or falling into.

As I basked in this beautiful place in my mind, God told me that His grace is more like this scene than being fenced into a small backyard by a highway. As His child I can explore, rest, wander, run, walk, lay down, play, or just be still anywhere in that place. The dark holes are places that aren’t in God’s plan for my best: rebellion, sin. The fence around each one is the reminder in God’s Word and from His Spirit directly to our hearts those places are dangerous and to stay out.

I am truly free to decide, of course, and if I choose, I can climb those fences and jump into the circles, but it’s pretty obvious in this picture that doesn’t lead to anything good. I could sit on the fence thinking about jumping into the holes, but then I miss out on the free roaming in the green grass and out in the hills. I can’t have both.

We don’t get to this place by staying out of the holes. It’s not living right that makes us welcome in God’s grace. God calls everyone to come, just the way we are. We get in by coming to Jesus in faith and seeking forgiveness. THEN we stay out of the holes, away from sin, not to make God happy and keep Him from being disappointed in us. Rather, we accept his boundaries out of gratitude for such love and freedom: freedom from guilt, freedom from shame, freedom from separation from Him, freedom from death. We trust He has our best in mind because He loves us.

Jesus said He came to give life and life abundantly! Remember the scene laid out in John chapter 8 of a woman caught in the act of adultery? She was dragged before Jesus by religious leaders to humiliate her and see if Jesus would agree she should be stoned for her sin. After reminding the leaders they, too, had sinned before and shouldn’t stand in judgment, He turned to look at the woman in compassion and asked her, “Has no one condemned you?” She answered, “No, Sir.” “Then neither do I. Go and leave your life of sin.”

Notice Jesus did not say, “Go and be sure you attend Synagogue every Sabbath, have a quiet time every single morning, and memorize Scripture. No drinking, smoking or cussing or I’ll be extremely disappointed in you.” Instead, He opened the door wide to that beautiful, peace-filled, green hills and open space place of His grace.

He loved her as she hadn’t been loved before. He loved her even as she stood ashamed and dirty with sin. God lavishes that love on us, too. He actually longs to give us His grace. He aches for each and every one of his kids to live and stay with Him day by day. “The LORD longs to be gracious to you; therefore he will rise up to show you compassion.” Isaiah 30:18

There will still be struggles and hard places to travel through even in God’s grace, but that freedom remains. He will discipline us sometimes and correct us, but freedom remains. And HE remains. He will never leave. He’s a good Father. He goes with us in love, not condemnation or score-keeping.

I hope if you follow Jesus, you are walking with Him head held high in the freedom of grace and not lagging behind him a few steps in fear or shame. If you have trouble really believing and knowing you are accepted by God without doing a single thing except believing in Jesus, then ask Him to help you understand how much He loves you. The antidote to fear and shame is knowing and believing God is good and He LOVES.

Thank you, God, for fencing off the places that lead to sin and death, but not fencing me in! Thank you for loving me, for giving me a new way to look at living day to day with you covered in and set free by Your grace.

“…[God’s] Perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced His perfect love.” 1 John 4:18

I’m a flyer, you’re a flyer…

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When was the last time you watched a trapeze act? It must be exhilarating to grip the bar, jump off the platform, swing down and then on the way up let go at the top and fly through the air. Thankfully a fellow trapeze artist is there at just the right time, grabs a hold and swings them to safety on the other side. I enjoy watching these acts most when there is a big net underneath, you know, just in case someone loses grip or doesn’t quite time things right. Then at least they will bounce safely at the bottom and nobody gets hurt.

I’m assuming these trapeze groups have relationships built on lots of trust. I bet the flyers really try to stay on the good side of the catchers, like baking them cookies, giving them foot rubs and the like.

It seems to me there are some very important truths about a good catcher: They must be strong, they must watch the flyer without distraction, they must have good timing, and they must jump out and swing toward the flyer at just the right moment to do their job and bring the flyer back with them.  I read that sometimes the catcher says a reassuring, “Gotcha!” as they grab hold of the flyer.

You may have heard flying on a trapeze as an illustration of a life of faith in God. In that scenario, we who follow Jesus are flyers who let go in life and trust the catcher, God, to be there. They say the flyer shouldn’t try to “catch” the catcher, but just let go of the trapeze bar, hold their arms out straight, and wait for the catcher grab hold. Trust. Big time.

It’s like a child jumping from the side of a pool to their Daddy standing in the water, only bigger and scarier. I mean, I’m flying through the air here Continue reading →

Psalm 91

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Last Sunday one of our friends at church, who has definitely had his share of troubles, reminded all of us to stop dwelling on and looking at our problems or challenges and look at Jesus instead. A simple truth. I’ve heard it so many times. Why should we do that?

Looking at my problems gives them more power to intimidate, threaten, and overwhelm me.  My mind then defaults to problem solving mode and trying to figure out how to fix it all. This stresses me out because I don’t know all the answers and I can’t fix it all! (Continual lesson and understatement of Mimi’s entire life.)

Looking at Jesus instead makes Him bigger in my eyes and heart, and my problems smaller or at least not occupying all of my attention. Locking my gaze on Jesus, I walk forward in the truth that assures my heart He’s in control, He is able, He is more than enough, His ways are higher, He is good, He loves me, He is faithful, He will help me, and He said He would always be with me. No worries.

The temporary loses out to the eternal. Proper perspective reminds me my hope and heart are sealed for eternity with Jesus. So bottom line, no worries!

Psalm 91 is full of promises from God for his little ones, his people: Continue reading →

Why so restless, soul?

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“It requires no faith to complain.” That’s a powerful, convicting truth I heard a month or so ago and God gave me one to accompany it recently: It requires no faith to have self-pity. How many times do I end up focusing on the things that aren’t the way I thought they would be, or personal shortcomings, or others’ perceived expectations or opinions?

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Participating in our healing

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Whenever Jesus healed people, he gave them a part to play in the miracle. This morning, I read the story of the ten lepers calling out to Jesus for mercy. The Bible says Jesus told them to go show themselves to the priest, but he didn’t tell them why. As they were on their way to do what he said, they were made clean, whole, healed!
What a beautiful reminder. Whatever healing we’re in need of, we participate in the process. There is a stepping out in faith, reaching out to God, some action that has to take place. 

I was thinking about this as I drove to work and asked God why. Why did Jesus do things that way? Why have us do something in order for the healing to happen instead of just healing us. He certainly doesn’t need our help.  He could’ve told the blind man who begged for him to stop and not pass by, “So you’re blind? Well, now you can see.” But instead he made mud and smeared it on the man’s eyes, then told him to go wash in the pool.  When the man did what Jesus said, he was healed.  Jesus could’ve said to the man with the withered hand, “Hey, look at your hand it’s all better now.” But, he said to the man, “reach out your hand.” When the man reached out, his hand was healed.

When we obey and do something God has told us to do to be healed it proves our faith. Then, when God helps us and we experience healing, it strengthens our faith.

In response to my “why?” question, I heard God tell me, “It’s because I’m relational. Rather than just do something to you, I want to do something with you.”

What a lovely thought. God is not a wish granter, machine-like and cold, but is a Father who takes personal interest in me, in you, and wants to be involved with us. It’s as if He says, “Let’s work out this healing together. I’ll provide the power, you provide the faith.”

I wonder if His heart is warmed when we willingly reach back to Him, if He cannot wait to do His part and help us, even surprise us with more than we hoped for.

I think even when we have little strength or are battle-worn, the slightest look up or leaning into God is enough. He has always said he doesn’t look at outward appearances but at our hearts. He wants to heal us.

I see this interaction in the greatest offer of healing. Jesus laid down His life, died for our sins and rose again. He stands, arms outstretched towards us, saying, “I can heal your relationship with God, repair the brokenness in your soul, and make you whole. Reach out your hand, your heart.” 

We can trust Him. We should do what He says. He’s so ready to do His part.

It happened that as he made his way toward Jerusalem, he crossed over the border between Samaria and Galilee. As he entered a village, ten men, all lepers, met him. They kept their distance but raised their voices, calling out, “Jesus, Master, have mercy on us!”

Taking a good look at them, he said, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” They went, and while still on their way, became clean. One of them, when he realized that he was healed, turned around and came back, shouting his gratitude, glorifying God. He kneeled at Jesus’ feet, so grateful. He couldn’t thank him enough—and he was a Samaritan.

Jesus said, “Were not ten healed? Where are the nine? Can none be found to come back and give glory to God except this outsider?” Then he said to him, “Get up. On your way. Your faith has healed and saved you.” (‭Luke‬ ‭17‬:‭11-19‬ MSG)

Let go, my soul

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I’ve been trusting in God since I was a little girl. I first heard Him and felt Him tug at my heart when I was very young. Back then, trust looked like listening to Bible stories, praying with my family, singing along in worship at church, listening and learning from my daddy’s sermons…childlike faith.  

As a teenager, I remember writing in my journal at night before bed, pouring out my heart to Jesus and reading my Bible to find guidance and encouragement.  Trust was me believing Jesus was my friend, my confidant, someone who would hold my heart through elation and heartbreak, crushes, questions, and insecurities.  I trusted in forgiveness when I did something stupid or messed up.

Through college and into adulthood, trust looked like seeking God with friends in Bible study and prayer, believing He had a plan for me, surrendering and saying “If you want me to be single all my life it’s okay,” then finding He had a special partner picked for me. 

John and I trusted God would help us know how to be parents.  Trust looked like depending on Him to provide even the most basic needs through lean times.  He once showed me I should trust Him as freely and without care as my little girls trusted us to take care of them.  

Sometimes trust in the young mom years looked like closing myself in the bathroom, near tears, telling God, “You said if we ask for wisdom you would give it. Well I need some right now!”  Trust was me believing God wouldn’t let me scar my children for life by mistakes I made.

At the sound of a cancer diagnosis, trust was something I was grasping for in desperation.  Do you believe I trust you, God, even though fear won’t seem to completely go away?  Does it mean my faith is lacking if I still feel anxious, if my heart trembles and hurts at the thought of not being here with my husband and girls anymore?  I can’t explain how, but God showed me clearly that He was just ahead on the path, around the bend, with hand reached back for me, making a way for me.  So I trusted Him.

There have been so many more faces of trust along the way, too many to recount here.

Trust. Critical foundation for any relationship. God has earned my trust and never broken it, though sometimes He has stretched my faith to the point I thought it would snap. When I’m fighting fear or the urge to try and orchestrate outcomes in my life or in the life of someone I love, I remember what He’s done in the past and consciously choose to trust Him.  Trust is a step out, a surrender of will and the demand to know. Trust is living in this day.

A recent favorite song says it this way, “Through it all, my eyes are on You. Throught it all, it is well. So, let go, my soul, and trust in Him. The wind and waves still know His name.” 1

In other words, God is the same as He was the last time He came through for me. His intentions and ability haven’t changed, His love as boundless as ever. He keeps His promises. He never leaves, though He will walk us through some pretty awful, dark places. 

So, let go, friend, of the need to know, of control, of wanting your way, of fears. Open hands and arms wide and feel freedom, like a bird taking flight into a steady supporting wind, floating and soaring.  You can trust God.

1 It Is Well by Kristene DiMarco, Bethel Music 

I’m so glad I have problems

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rocky pathThe path we walk when we follow Jesus has potholes. This isn’t a complaint, it’s just the truth. The path is not a wide, paved, beautifully landscaped street but more like a rocky, narrow, twisting, sometimes harrowing trail that is downright difficult to walk at times. It will push us to our limits and beyond, test our resolve, even bring us pain. There are times we might even question, “why did I agree to come this way?”

Jesus never said it would be a stroll in the park, but He did say not to lose heart when we we’re having trouble because He’s overcome the world. (John 16:33) Following someone who’s overcome the world – pretty good credentials, don’t you think?

I’ve lived long enough to be able to look back and see that the path we’ve covered so far has made my faith stronger, though sometimes it takes me a minute (or more) to remember that when I’m in the middle of tough terrain.

James said we should actually be glad in our troubles, because of what they do for us. “When troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” (James 1:2-4 NLT)

It’s one thing to persevere through hard times, it’s another to actually be glad about them. If I say to someone, “I’m so glad I’m dealing with this difficult person and that they’re hurting me,” they’d probably look at me like I had two heads. But God’s thoughts are not our thoughts, His ways are not our ways. There’s no doubt about that. He doesn’t allow us to have difficulties just so He can show He’s bigger than we are, or just to have us grovel at His feet needing help. Each problem has a purpose: to make us more like Jesus and to witness to God’s goodness and glory.

Before a potter shapes clay or even puts it on the pottery wheel, he pounds it and throws it down numerous times on the table to work out any air bubbles that might be inside and would later be a problem. Before precious metals are formed into valuable objects of beauty, the refiner heats the silver or gold to melting (over 1800 degrees fahrenheit!) and then skims off the impurities as they rise to the surface.

In both cases, the creator is present and personally involved through the whole process.

Feeling like you’re taking a pounding? Or being melted down in a crucible, completely helpless? Sometimes our faith feels like a rubber band that is stretched so tightly it might break. The thought of trusting God one more day is exhausting, and then He asks us to trust another day after that.

Can we praise Him anyway? Can we trust Him? Can we remind ourselves of all He’s done for us in the past? Does knowing He promised He will bring good out of everything for those who love him help us surrender? Some days I enthusiastically answer “Yes!” Some days I have to confess to Jesus that I don’t have the strength on my own, I need Him to help me to believe. Praising Him raises our gaze to Him again and helps. It truly helps. We can have peace that steadies our weak legs and can make it through.

I tried to express this to a friend who was losing someone she loved. It felt almost insensitive to encourage someone to thank God in everything when their troubles are so personal, so deeply painful. How do you tell someone to be glad that they’re having to deal with that? The act of giving thanks in difficulty is part of the refining process. That decision alone can be excruciating.

All I know is that God proves Himself loving and good when we give in and praise Him even in that kind of loss. He shows understanding and compassion. He knows the deepest places of our hearts. It was too hard for my friend, but I still pray God will show her how much He loves her and that she can trust Him.

The end result of trusting God and even thanking Him through troubles is worth the pain. I don’t want to stay the same, do you? I don’t want to walk an easy path if it’s without Jesus. If problems help refine me, then I’m glad I have them. I will try to remember to thank God when they come. I want to grow and reach my goal: to be with God forever and ever, without blemish or fault, without any more struggle with this world or myself…free and home.

So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you must endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. (I Peter 1:6-7 NLT)

My one word

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Somewhere I read about how some choose or ask God to give them one word to focus on this year, a theme for their walk with Jesus in 2015. I hadn’t even asked God yet and He gave me my one word.

During the Christmas season last month a phrase from Scripture kept replaying in my heart and mind: “What is impossible for people is possible with God.” (Luke 18:27 NLT) Jesus said that to the disciples and I can imagine Gabriel might have said it to Mary when He brought her the staggering news that God’s Son would be born into the world through her small, human self.

Though doubt and discouragement have been nagging companions dragging their feet and distracting me, my one word causes me to let go of their hands and look ahead, to look up squinting in the bright light of God’s presence in front of me and all around me. There is more, and it’s good. There is hope and promise and it’s all God’s doing. It’s not up to me, thank goodness.

I am so limited, short-sighted, plagued by fickle yet powerful emotions that can change moment to moment and blind me. My one word is already becoming a beacon back to the path God has for me, an enthusiastic shout to look again at Him, a crucial reminder that it’s not about me and my limitations don’t dictate what God can or cannot do.

My one word is “possible.” I want to live by that word this year. I want to seek out the lessons I can learn, the greater faith God can help me grab hold of, the grander view of more of the eternal in this short life, the freedom from myself when I continually acknowledge Him as the One who CAN.

He once asked Abraham, “Is anything too hard for the Lord?” Now He’s asking me.

No, Papa, I know nothing is impossible for You. Keep tight hold of my hand and keep my eyes open to all that is possible, with You.

Fears vs. Dreams

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“The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dreams is you.” – Tom Bradley

Do you agree with that? Do you have a dream or several?

If we would sit down and intentionally search ourselves, I believe each of us will find, sometimes way down inside in a secret, guarded place, a dream.

The organization To Write Love on Her Arms, which exists to come alongside young people who are fighting depression, self-hate, addiction, and self-mutilation, posted a campaign asking people to post something they fear and something they dream about: Fears vs. Dreams. It’s interesting and inspiring to read as people open up and put their hearts out there honestly. Some that I read:

Fear: being surrounded by love and still feel alone Dream: be a part of something bigger than myself

Fear: to live without purpose Dream: to achieve the extraordinary

Fear: letting my family down Dream: be the best daddy ever

Fear: to be judged and not loved Dream: to share love with the world

Fear: losing my son Dream: Owning my own cafe

You can view more here on their web site. There were many I could relate to.

What would your fear vs. dreams sign say?

I have a very large, sometimes crushing fear of being a failure, of letting God down and not being all He created me to be. I have thought and thought about why that presses so hard against me and why it lingers, even though I know that I don’t have to earn God’s favor or love. Somehow my heart keeps yearning for His approval, for Him to be pleased with what I do, how I live my life. My perfectionist nature probably doesn’t help.

God has told me in my heart that I already have his approval because Jesus died for me, but if I’m honest, I still fear sometimes not pleasing Him.

My personal dream is to live a life that matters, to be a person who helps other people learn about Jesus and want to follow him. I don’t want to just go through the motions of every day.

My dream, as a pastor’s wife, is very similar. I dream that John and I will be the kind of leaders that help a church thrive and reach out to lost people. I definitely don’t want to just go through the motions or be in a church Jesus would call “lukewarm” or that had forgotten its first love.

Experiences in the past bruised those dreams and pushed them way back inside. Sometimes when we mess up or fall short, the enemy makes us embarrassed that we ever had that dream in the first place. I can hear him sneer, “That won’t ever happen. Give up.”

I have been almost afraid to talk with God, or other people, about them because deep in my heart I sometimes feel they won’t happen. It’s easier to not have a dream than to have one and not have it become reality, right? Or is it?

I believe the quote above is true. The only thing stopping me from realizing my dream is me. Instead of choosing fear, if I choose to trust God even when I don’t see how He could make it all happen, I can still dream my dream. If I choose to believe that He can do the impossible, with any person, in any circumstance, I know I will be amazed and joyfully surprised to see what happens. I actually want to be blown away. I know it will all be because of Him, but I want to be a part of it!

He bids us to come to Him with boldness and tell him our dream. He may help it become reality, or He may direct us to a different dream, one He has in mind for us that is often bigger and brighter than what we came up with.

My prayer lately is that God will remove those irritating walls I put up around my limited vision of Him. I pray He will knock down self-imposed limitations and negative things I tell myself. I pray He will replace it all with hope and true, undeniable, rock-solid faith in all He is and all He can do. I want Him to fill my ears and eyes and heart to bursting – so full of His awesome presence and purpose that there is no room for lies and doubt.

Papa, I have a dream…