I’ve not had time to really sit down and think about writing lately.  I wish I did – I love to do it and it helps me process what’s going on inside.  It might help if I jot down a few things going through my pea brain the last few days.

• My grandmother is in the skilled unit of her assisted living facility now.  She had pneumonia and spent a few days in the hospital and it took a toll on her.  Her 95 1/2 year old body seems tinier to me now, her voice softer, her eyes much heavier and sleepier.  I feel the need to go see her often and get in as many kisses on that soft cheek of hers that I can.  I wish we could just talk and visit but she is so weak and drowsy.
• I’ve never had to live day by day in all aspects of my life as much as I am now:  spiritually, emotionally, financially.  I take comfort in the fact that God has never let me down and each day I have what I need and more.  I don’t know for sure what’s up tomorrow but I find as I take each step, send up each prayer, carry out what I know to do to take care of my family and try to stay close to God that I’m making it!  Yes it’s hard, but God is faithful.  I have my down days but mostly peaceful ones – especially when I honestly cry out to Him (pretty much every morning on the way to work) and share the heavies weighing on my heart.  He welcomes me in love and helps me shoulder the heavies.   Why does He care?  Why does He love?  This leads me to the next thought that’s been churning around in my head: Continue reading →