Slaying Self

It happens so regularly that it’s predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God’s commands, but it’s pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.

I’ve tried everything and nothing helps. I’m at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn’t that the real question?  Romans 7:21-24 The Msg                   These words were penned by the apostle Paul.

It’s the daily battle with a relentless enemy that gets me down lately.  I constantly have to deal with a shrewd pain in the spiritual rear who plays on my emotions, tries to draw me back to old habits once left behind, swaggers along behind tossing a heavy coat of insecurity and pride on me time and time again no matter how many times I throw it off.  Whenever I get irritated enough to turn around I see that it’s me:  my old nature, my sinful self following me around.

I want to get rid of self but it’s like a static cling.   No matter what milestones I pass or lessons I learn, it’s a dormant disease that never fully goes away.  I feel I could scream Paul’s words sometimes.  What can I do, God?  I know what’s right but so often don’t do it.  I’m my own worst enemy!  Help!

In the book “Voyage of the Dawn Treader” by C.S. Lewis, one of the main characters, Eustace, discovers the answer to this universal problem.  Continue reading

Even more “beautiful”

Can you stand it?  More beautiful??  (3rd post in a row with “beautiful” in the title for those who wonder what the heck I’m talking about)

I’m thinking of a song I love tonight as I’ve been listening to God tell me that there’s no need to panic when those I love make choices I wouldn’t want them to make or seem to be struggling a little to “find their feet” on this path.  He is able and He is watching.  He’s never distracted or bewildered as to how to help them or draw them near.  He loves them, so much more than I do, which is hard for me to grasp when I feel it so deeply from my insides out.  Right now, though my first impulse was to talk and try to control I feel God telling me to be quiet, to watch and see.  I’m praying and trying to stay so close to Him so that I can hear whenever He prompts me to speak and help, but in the meantime I can almost see him wave his arms out in a flourish with a big smile and say “Watch what I can do!  Out of the ashes, out of blunders, out of missteps, I will bring beauty, healing, and wholeness.”  I’m watching, Papa.  Please handle with care.  You know how much she means to me.

I lift up my hands

I lift up my hands in prayer – presenting myself wide open and vulnerable before You, God.  I trust You.

I lift my hands in awe and amazement and then spread them far out in front of me as I kneel down with my head to the ground.  You are holy.  The palms of my hands press against the cool earth, a reminder of where I came from, that I’m really dust.  How is it that you care about me, God?   Continue reading

One step closer to hope

SPOILER ALERT:  This post contains details about the movie “Devil” currently in theaters, story by M. Night Shyamalan.

Do you believe in the devil?  If so, what do you think about him?  Or what fables have you heard about him?  I’ve always wondered where the image of a little red guy with a greasy mustache, pointy tail and a pitchfork came from.  There really aren’t many details about him in the Bible that tell us who he is other than a fallen angel, thief, prince of darkness, father of lies, and deceiver.  Jesus said the devil only aims to do three things:  to steal, kill and destroy  (John 10:10).  Peter warned us, “Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”  I Peter 5:8

M. Night Shyamalan uses that verse from Peter as a springboard to tell a story about sinners and their fate.  Although it’s fantasy, there are some truths in the movie, truths that won’t leave me alone today. Continue reading

Did you know?

Did you know…

  • That you’re free – free to just be the “you” God made you to be
  • You’re not responsible for the choices other people make, just your own
  • You don’t have to save everyone or fix their problems, only Jesus can do that
  • You don’t have to figure out how to get from point A to point B, you just trust God
  • You are loved more than you can possibly think of, dream up or imagine, even when you mess up
  • There’s no such thing as a perfect person (except for Jesus)
  • Everyone has some kind of dysfunction in their life and in their family, and that’s okay
  • God made you the way you are on purpose and He has good things for you to do, in whichever stage of life you find yourself right now
  • It’s okay to laugh and have fun when you worship and praise God
  • God gave everything to have you near, to have you walk with Him, talk with Him, love Him and be with Him forever.
  • God’s forgiveness and fresh start are available for you today and every day.
  • You can’t make God love you more by “being good.”  He just loves because He IS love.  So be still and be loved by Him.  Do good just to thank Him and help others know Him.
  • That anything good in me and you is from God, not from us
  • You connect with God differently than others, and that’s okay.  You may connect through music, through being outdoors, through journaling, through quiet times, through serving other people…whichever way you connect to Him is okay.
  • Guilt is not from God.  It helps us realize we need to change but God doesn’t want us to live under guilt.  He means for us to be FREE
  • You are FREE when you accept Jesus’ forgiveness and surrender to Him.  I’m talking truly free.
  • This day is God’s gift to you because He loves you.  He was watching you sleep and couldn’t wait for you to open your eyes and wake up.  He’s singing over You because He is so delighted in You, today, right now.  Take His hand and just wait and see all the beautiful things He will show you.

New Every Morning

mer • cy [mur see] noun
1.  compassionate or kindly forbearance shown toward an offender, an enemy, or other person in one’s power
2.  the discretionary power of a judge to pardon someone or to mitigate punishment

Do you ever feel like you’ve really grown, reached some new milestones in your faith and become stronger, only to look in the mirror one day to see a shallow, doubting, pouting, childish disciple looking back? Continue reading

Got Grace?

I made a big mistake at work today.  It hasn’t happened for a while but it was bound to.  I get lots of projects going and something will fall through the cracks of my brain.  There are some pretty wide cracks and gaping holes in there, my brain that is.

To make matters worse, my error affects a friend of mine and he isn’t too keen on the situation.  I don’t blame him.  As I realized what happened I got that awful stomach-twisting, hard to describe nervous feeling go up the back of my back and neck and my heart started pounding a little faster.  Continue reading

The Courage of Christ

My family and I decided to attend the “Journey to the Cross” Good Friday event at our church, not fully knowing what to expect.

In the last few years, this type of observance seems to be becoming popular, replacing services in which we just sit, sing songs and pray.  Those are good things to do but I’m glad people have used their creativity to come up with ways for people to physically walk through, smell, taste, hear and feel the story.  The story of Jesus’ death and resurrection can become benign to those of us who have heard or read it year after year.  It may even cease to really affect us or make us think harder about the gravity of what Jesus did and experienced.

The “Journey to the Cross” is the first experiential-type setting we’ve been through in first person as if walking in Jesus’ place, sensing a tiny bit of what it must have been like for him.  We began by entering a room set up as the last supper, Continue reading

I love you

A husband and wife sat together at the kitchen table in awkward silence.  They had decided, having trouble getting along lately, that perhaps they should share with one another the frustrations they had with each other by each making a list.  After some quiet thought and pencil scratching it was time to share their complaints.  The husband read his wife’s first. A long list of his faults filled the page, and then another page. Continue reading

Where everybody knows your name

Do you remember the show “Cheers”?  Funny!  One of my favorite parts was when each “regular” entered the bar and everyone shouted out their name.  “Norm!”   The words of the theme song said it well,

Making your way in the world today
takes everything you’ve got.
Taking a break from all your worries
sure would help a lot.
Wouldn’t you like to get away?
Sometimes you want to go
Where everybody knows your name,
and they’re always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see,
our troubles are all the same.
You wanna be where everybody knows Your name.

Now that my family and I are without our church family, we’ve realized how important it is to be part of a church – a place where you feel you belong, where you matter, where you can serve and help, where friends know you, and where you can share life’s ups and downs while following Jesus with others.  We realize, too, that we don’t have many friends outside of our church family to hang out with now.  We need to work on that!

Just like Cheers, I think the Church should embrace whoever comes through the door, no matter where they’ve come from or what they’re like.  Just like Cheers, I think the Church should be open with each other, making it easy for each one to express heartaches or hang-ups, relating to each other, listening to each other, being there for each other.  It should be a place where everyone expresses to everyone else, “No one is perfect.  We’ve all got problems.  We’re just doing life together here.”  I think it should be fun, too.  Celebrating life and the free forgiveness we have from Christ should definitely make get-togethers upbeat to say the least!

It goes back to one of my life mottos, which I learned long ago at a seminar by David Ferguson:  my purpose and yours is to help others be less alone.  God doesn’t want anyone to go through life alone, and not just alone in the physical sense, in an emotional/spiritual sense.  Life’s a team sport, a group effort, a shared journey.  At least it’s supposed to be.

I work in an office that supports churches across the state of Indiana.  Sometimes we hear of conflicts arising in a church – either between church people or the people and the pastor.  It is disheartening to watch sometimes…many times.  One time we received a letter from a woman on the board at a church in conflict.  She said the way the others on the board were acting, fighting, and accusing had caused her to question her faith in Jesus and made her want to go back to hang out at the bar where she had friends and felt welcome.  That broke my heart!

We all have to get over ourselves.  We have to say to ourselves each morning as we look in the mirror:  “It is not about me today.”  We have to remember why we are the Church: to draw in anyone who will come and love them in Jesus’ name.  To say to them, “You matter.”  To walk with them as they step closer to Christ.  To hopefully put their hand in His as they accept Him as Lord and gain new life!   It is not about me.  It’s not about you.  It is about Jesus, love, forgiveness, grace, and yes, friendship, camaraderie, acceptance, and (most of the time) fun.