Tag Archives: humble

Hi. My name is Mimi and I’m a control freak.

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Secrets keep you “sick.” It’s truth.

If you want to beat a compulsion or addiction the first step is to admit there’s a problem. You have to admit it to yourself and then to other people. The Bible even recommends it: “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)

Hello. My name is Mimi. I’m a control freak.

Over the years I have caused myself so much anxiety and unnecessary stress because my little perfectionistic, likes to have a plan, very busy self feels like I know how things should be. My tendency is to, often subconsciously, try to manipulate and control people or situations to get the outcome I think is best. Just being real, peeps. Anyone feeling me out there?

I’m blessed to have some people in my life, who, along the way have helped me (and still help me) to see this problem and gently bring me to those so important places of realization which leads to being humbled which leads to saying I’m sorry which should lead to me doing less of the aforementioned attempted controlling. That is the ideal anyway!

I can remember a Sunday years ago when my husband (the pastor) woke up sick and our associate pastor was home with a broken foot. I got to church and started trying to figure out what to do for the service. Continue reading →

Why so restless, soul?

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“It requires no faith to complain.” That’s a powerful, convicting truth I heard a month or so ago and God gave me one to accompany it recently: It requires no faith to have self-pity. How many times do I end up focusing on the things that aren’t the way I thought they would be, or personal shortcomings, or others’ perceived expectations or opinions?

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Learning, learning

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It always hurts – those times when God holds up His mirror to show me something in myself that isn’t part of who He made me to be.  I had a critical attitude about something/someone last week and then found myself Sunday doing the very thing I was critical about.

I heard God’s voice loud and clear, reminding me not to judge others, to be concerned with my own self, to be patient even when I don’t feel patient, and to always extend grace to other people because none of us is perfect.

I had to confess quietly, sitting on the piano bench at church, because the worship service was starting.  I was already pretty ashamed of myself.  Then, as it always seems to happen with God’s teaching and molding of me, the sermon happened to be about being crucified with Christ.  Of course.   Continue reading →

More than meets the eye

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I must warn you upfront that this post is kind of rambly and disjointed.  Okay, read on if you like.

We all make judgments about other people all the time, in split seconds.  Most of the time I think we base our judgments on the way they look, sound, act or smell.  Unfortunately, I think a lot of our judgments are critical because so much of our thought-life is driven by pride, even when we are doing our best to follow Jesus and live humbly.  I catch myself thinking critical thoughts a lot.  Probably need to take that one to God on my knees a little more fervently.  I don’t like thinking those thoughts and sure don’t want someone thinking them about  me.  They sure could, especially on days like today when I ventured out with no make-up and shaggy hair.

I’m not talking about dwelling long and hard on these judgments, just formulating instant impressions.

Can you tell I’m feeling a wee bit convicted about all of this?   Continue reading →

Find Rest

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Where can we find it?

Elusive, so temporary, fleeting – the rest the world offers.

A vacation or day to do nothing doesn’t really offer the true rest my heart needs.

Can I find rest in a time of uncertainty, stress, concerns that pile up?  Jesus said I can.   The rest He’s offering is a deep, spiritual, soul-filling, healing rest and I want it.  As I drive home today I’m going to spill it all out to Him.  He said it was okay!

He said, “Come.”  I’m coming.

He said, “all you who are weary.”  I’m weary.

He said, “you who are heavy laden.”  I feel weighed down by a lot of thoughts, questions, concerns, and some hurt in my heart.

He said, “Come and learn of me, for I am gentle and humble in heart.”  I can even hear Him say, “I won’t belittle you for coming, I won’t tell you to just deal with it, I won’t turn you away even if you come again and again.”

He gave His word:  “you will find rest.”  Not you just might find rest, but you WILL.  I need it, Lord.  Please keep your word.  Not only for me but for those I love, those on my heart.  Please help us to find your rest.

(This promise is found in Matthew 11:28)

As Iron Sharpens Iron

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Today God answered a prayer I prayed recently. I prayed he would keep me humble. I don’t know why I keep praying that prayer. He always answers and it is always painful – sometimes a little, sometimes a lot. This time it involved something I have done for a while and did recently that hurt a dear friend of mine. I don’t like admitting it or facing the parts of myself that have yet to be pruned away completely. At the same time, I realize that although God wants us to “forget” ourselves so that He can shine through us, he doesn’t want us to go so low as to feel sorry for ourselves or dwell on the awfulness of a flaw or mistake.

knifesharpMy friend graciously forgave me as we talked this afternoon. I’ve been thinking about it since and remembered that verse in Proverbs 27:17, “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” As we walk our path alongside our friends we sometimes clash, sometimes accidentally bang into one another, sometimes get scraped. If we’re following Jesus, He can use these “incidents” to sharpen each of us, to mold us, to perfect us. This type of shaping is bound to hurt – sometimes a little, sometimes a lot – but the end result can be good.

God’s been speaking to me a lot lately about forgetting myself, about letting Him always be in the lead and in control, about trusting him and others around me. It’s not about me (where have I heard that before?). Today I was reminded that things don’t have to be perfect or just so to glorify God. Don’t I think that God can work in and through all that we do, perfectly done or not? Who’s to say my way is the perfect right way anyway? That alone speaks of a pride issue in my heart – or that I think pretty highly of my opinion.

This past week in church we heard a message about the poor in spirit inheriting all that God has to offer, now and forever. Poor in spirit – realizing I have nothing without God, that without God and his mercy I would be utterly lost and completely without hope. It was evidently time for a reminder for me! I’m thankful for a gracious friend who doesn’t begrudge me the scrapes I unintentionally gave her this week.

Maybe God will even use our rough patch of path to hone her as well, making her even more beautiful and effective for His use. I sure hope He does that in me.

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” Prov. 27:17 NLT