Tag Archives: hurting

Where does it hurt?

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My Grandma told me once about a time when my Uncle Pete was just a toddler, a time when he wouldn’t stop crying and fussing. She fed him, had already changed him, tried to comfort him, then put him to bed. He kept wailing and fussing. She even gave him a little spank because she thought he was being obstinate about going to bed. His cries persisted, his little cheeks all wet with tears. She decided to check his diaper again and maybe even give him a bath to calm him down. As she undressed him, she found that one little toe had gotten all bent up caught in the elastic of his footie pajamas and was all red. She confessed, almost teary-eyed, that she felt awful being upset with him when the whole time he was crying because his little toe was hurting and he didn’t know how to make it feel better.

As adults, we may not always cry, but there are times we get irritable, Continue reading →

I can’t fix it…and that is precisely the point

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My heart and mind have been ruminating all day about hope, faith, doubt, Jesus, God, despair, pain, disappointments, trust, and truth.  I’m a little weary inside tonight.

Already having a mini faith crisis of sorts lately, pondering truth and what I really, truly believe about God, Jesus, eternity and life and…when I try to solve these issues on my own I just find myself walking in circles, getting nowhere and feeling restless.

With all this filling my heart already, today I reached a tipping point.  A dear friend who has so much pressure in her life already shared some details with me of the latest tough news and troubling lack of answers and hopeful outcomes.  As I listened I felt so inept, incapable of helping her.  I was thinking I should say something about Jesus but we were at work at the front desk and it wasn’t the right time.  And for some reason I felt it would come across as ineffective or cliché, like offering to put a little Band-aid on a gaping wound, or bailing out a sinking boat with a teaspoon.

Then I felt guilty for feeling that way.  Maybe I hesitated, too, because I wasn’t confident at the moment of that hope myself.  Why was my heart hesitating? Continue reading →

Pondering peace, love and other Christmas stuff

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I was quietly enjoying a breakfast burrito at McDonald’s and catching up on twitter on my phone this morning when all of a sudden I heard a woman’s angry voice shouting, “This is the worst service EVER!!  You suck!!”  Then someone else shouted “Merry Christmas!”  I didn’t see it happen but I’m assuming she stormed out after hurling that piece of her mind at the surprised workers behind the counter.  It’s true they were a little slow today and it was very busy there, but I’m not sure their less-than-speedy service warranted that attack.  My first thought was how mean and unfair it was for her to do that and that if I was that worker I would probably be fighting back tears.  I hate to get yelled at.  Now that I think about it, does anyone like getting yelled at?   My next thought was that she must be stressed-out or already worked up about something else to react so strongly.  And down deep, she must be hurting.  Hurt usually leads to anger.

The first few weeks of December when we had no money to buy presents and were anticipating a very simple Christmas, God gave me a little (emphasis on little) perspective of what it’s like for so many people every year.  There are lots of families who struggle to make ends meet and aren’t able to do much, if anything, in the gift buying and giving department.  You know, there is a lot of pressure from people’s expectations and TV commercials about buying stuff, buying stuff, and buying more stuff.  I hadn’t realized it as much until this year.  Often the first question in passing conversation is “Have you gotten your shopping done?”   Continue reading →

Wise words from Grandma

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comfortingIn an email conversation with my dad this morning, he reminded me of a time that was tough in my mom’s life (physically at least).  She had all three of us by C-section and shortly after my little brother was born she had to have her gall bladder removed!  This was back when they didn’t do the tiny little belly button incisions.  She was hurting.  My grandmother, her mother-in-law, told her during that time, “When you’re hurting, somebody needs you.”  This took my mom aback.  Someone needs me?  I’m hurting here!  I’m the one who just had two surgeries almost back to back.  Nonetheless, during my mom’s hospital stay she encountered another patient, a lady who was hurting in her heart, not just her body.  God used Mom to encourage and bless that lady.  It may not have happened if Mom’s heart hadn’t been opened to the possibility by grandma’s wise words.

Wow – this is good truth!  One of the enemy’s biggest tactics to mess me up is self-pity and self-absorption.  There’s no better way to counter that attack, no better way to get your mind off of yourself and your hurts than to look for someone who needs you, someone you can bless or encourage or serve.

It seems that getting absorbed in ourselves and our pain actually multiplies the pain.  What seems to be a help becomes a hindrance.

We’re going through some refining big-time these days, my family and my church family.  We’ve got to lean into it, even when it hurts, because it’s for our good.   Then we need to realize that it’s not only for our good, but so we can be better at reaching to people who don’t know God or His love yet.  It’s not about us.

So I say to the Klotz family and to the New Life family, “When you’re hurting, somebody needs you.”  Look outwardly, strain your necks and hearts to see who you can love on and encourage today, lean into the refining but then keep looking at God and the purpose of it all:  to make us more like Him so we can bring more of his lost kids back to Him.

And thanks, Grandma.