Slaying Self

It happens so regularly that it’s predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God’s commands, but it’s pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.

I’ve tried everything and nothing helps. I’m at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn’t that the real question?  Romans 7:21-24 The Msg                   These words were penned by the apostle Paul.

It’s the daily battle with a relentless enemy that gets me down lately.  I constantly have to deal with a shrewd pain in the spiritual rear who plays on my emotions, tries to draw me back to old habits once left behind, swaggers along behind tossing a heavy coat of insecurity and pride on me time and time again no matter how many times I throw it off.  Whenever I get irritated enough to turn around I see that it’s me:  my old nature, my sinful self following me around.

I want to get rid of self but it’s like a static cling.   No matter what milestones I pass or lessons I learn, it’s a dormant disease that never fully goes away.  I feel I could scream Paul’s words sometimes.  What can I do, God?  I know what’s right but so often don’t do it.  I’m my own worst enemy!  Help!

In the book “Voyage of the Dawn Treader” by C.S. Lewis, one of the main characters, Eustace, discovers the answer to this universal problem.  Continue reading

Waaaaaa

I’m reading several books at once and that probably isn’t the best idea for my scatterbrain to retain something valuable from each one.  I started reading “The Me I Want to Be” by John Ortberg (discussing as I progress through with a good friend of mine) and am still reading it.  Then another good friend recommended “Shattered Dreams” by Larry Crabb which is also a really good book.    Toss in my daily Bible reading and, slightly embarrassed to admit, another read through of Eclipse and there are lots of words tumbling around in my head.

I haven’t written for a few days, oddly enough because I felt at a loss for words.  If I could just grab a hold of a few of the ones churning in my mind and put them into some kind of meaningful order to share with you.  Continue reading