The co-grandma adventure

IMG_4177I’m a grandma. Yes, I say it proudly. I became one alongside my co-grandma, my son-in-law’s mom, Maureen.

We’ve been friends for a long time, becoming closer once our kids started dating.  In fact, after Kimmi and Nathanael’s first date, Maureen called me at work and when I answered the first thing she said was, “Is this the possible future mother-in-law of my son?” We laughed with hopeful hearts, and then with full-to-bursting hearts, we hugged at their wedding the next year.

We don’t communicate regularly but whenever we get together we have a wonderful time. I love her.

I got a call at work on a Thursday from my sweet first-born girl telling me she would be induced on Saturday. “I’ll be there!” I told her excitedly. Not long after, I got a text from Maureen in Indiana asking if I would pick her up on the way. Her husband Jim would be flying in later. What a great plan!

It was a spotless sunny day for me to drive from Illinois to grandma-hood. Maureen called when I was about 2 hours from her house asking if she had time to bake cookies. What a great idea! Cookies are always a good idea, especially Maureen’s cookies. I finally got to her house and hopped out of the car, got a big hug from my friend, put her things in the trunk (including freshly baked cookies) and we took off for Ohio.

The rest of the drive was much more fun. We talked and talked, about the baby, about our kids, about blessings and struggles of ministry life (Maureen is a pastor’s wife, too).  Once we arrived, a late night run to Cracker Barrell was in order due to Kimmi’s craving for biscuits and gravy, then the kids were off to the hospital to spend the night and Maureen and I settled in at their house.

The next morning after their greyhound, Danny was taken care of, we hopped in the car, found a Starbucks, found the hospital, delivered said Starbucks to Kimmi and Nathanael, and sat down in the room with them to wait.  Whenever it was time to check Kimmi’s progress, Maureen and I would step out in the hall, waiting for permission to come back in. The last time we stepped out it was time for Kimmi to start pushing.  The labor room was in a hallway with only three rooms and the other two were empty at this point.  The grandma plan was to stand outside the room, with a foot in the door to keep it slightly open like any respectable eavesdropper, in hopes of hearing the long-awaited miracle moment of Ezra’s birth and first cry.

Our hearts were beating fast and we leaned close to listen until we were interrupted by a nurse we hadn’t seen yet that day, who must have just come on shift. With a stern expression, she instructed us that it was hospital policy to not allow visitors to congregate in the hallway and that we would need to go out of the labor hallway and out to the waiting area. Reluctantly, begrudgingly, we obeyed. Maureen dubbed our new friend “Nurse Deitzel” as she had a militant, “keeping order” air down pat.

We sat alone in the waiting room down the hall…waiting. Maureen flipped absent-mindedly through a magazine, I messed around on my iPad.  I set it down to find a water fountain and as I was walking back, Maureen hopped up and said excitedly, “The lullaby! It’s playing! He’s here!”  (whenever a baby was born, Brahm’s lullaby was played over the speakers in the maternity ward.) I scrambled to my chair, “let me cover up my iPad real quick!” only to realize the song playing was from the game “Candy Crush.” Argh!  Crestfallen, we sat back down only to spring back up as Nathanael came through the doorway beaming, “He’s here!” Lots of hugs shared, he gave us the details so we could update family and friends who had been waiting with us and keep tabs through texts.

The moment finally came when we could walk, practically skip, back down the hallway and into the room to see Kimmi sitting up in bed, with her precious boy all wrapped up, lying still and quiet in mom’s arms. Yes! Finally! Praise God. So proud. So blessed. So happy I couldn’t even cry.

The grandmas went to pick up pizza and bring it back, only to pass “Nurse Deitzel” in the hallway. We smiled cheerily at her and marched right on to the room where our grandson was. No stopping us now!

The next day was all fun: Lots more getting Starbucks, food for lunch and dinner, holding Ezra, visiting with the new mom and dad…just being grandmas. I love this role.

Maureen had to leave Sunday. I stayed until Tuesday, so got to hold little Ezra John (EJ) his first night at home in between feedings so his Mommy (my beautiful daughter!) could hopefully sleep a little bit.  EJ and I slept on the couch – I will never forget that night. I was exhausted the next day driving home but also still riding the high of all this love.

EJ will never lack love and I often thank God that we share grandparenthood with Jim and Maureen, two of the best who love Jesus so much and love people so well. Dear friends. Fellow co-grandparent adventurers! And it’s just beginning.

(Ezra John will be two in September! I wrote this shortly after he was born and never posted it. Reminiscing brings it all back as if it were yesterday.)

The living what I blog phenomenon

I am having to read my own words and practice them today…the ones in that last post about being thankful and how it changes our perspective and attitude?

Almost without fail, I will blog about something and then very soon after have to practice what I preach, like my own words get bounced back at me, or like I’m being tested to see if I will live what I’m learning.

Lord, help me to keep a thankful heart today.  I can feel the enemy prowling around, like he always does, seeking a way to devour.  Set my eyes on you, be near me today.

Let all that I am praise the LORD; 
      with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name. 
 2 Let all that I am praise the LORD; 
      may I never forget the good things he does for me. 
 3 He forgives all my sins 
      and heals all my diseases. 
 4 He redeems me from death 
      and crowns me with love and tender mercies. 
 5 He fills my life with good things. 
      My youth is renewed like the eagle’s!  Psalm 103:1-5 NLT

Humbled, happy heart

I sat there listening to her sing her heart in phrases and heard God talk to me, as well, “I’m showing you again that I have the power to influence this young lady’s heart.  I made her, you know.  I have planted more in her than you could dream of or design.  As precious as you are to me, you are not the author of this young one’s soul and faith.  I Am.”

Thank you, God, and forgive me for doubting, worrying or trying to orchestrate.  Thank you for hearing my deepest heart prayers for her (and for all my daughters) – that You would draw her near, that You would comfort her and give her the strength to surrender to you.   You can handle the angry cries, the stubborn thoughts, the questions and more.  You keep painting beauty over those things and then giving me glimpses of this tough and tender work of art that is my daughter.

How I’ve underestimated all my girls at times, in many ways.  Don’t let me do it any more.  Why would I think they are any less complicated, any less deep thinkers and ponderers, any less in tune with God than I am?  Why would I not think You talk to them the way You do me, that You relish every moment they sit with you, read Your word, sing songs to You?  I’m simply a few years farther down the path, but we’re on the same path following You, “I Am”, our incredible Savior and Creator.

We harmonized together on some familiar tunes and I was drawn into worship as I sat in sleepy comfort.  You were sitting right there, Jesus.  The only thing I can do is bow down in my heart, my thankful, peace-filled, humbled heart.

This song will hold more meaning for me from now on:

You stood before creation
Eternity in your hand
You spoke the earth into motion
My soul now to stand

You stood before my failure
And carried the cross for my shame
My sin weighed upon your shoulders
My soul now to stand

So what could I say?
And what could I do?
But offer this heart, Oh God
Completely to you

So I’ll walk upon salvation
Your spirit alive in me
This life to declare your promise
My soul now to stand

So what could I say?
And what could I do?
But offer this heart, Oh God
Completely to you        (© Hillsong United)

Getting healthier after some turmoil last year when pastor left. Facility is really nice and new. Upward basketball – 200+ kids. Pretty good sense of mission, awareness of the need to be missional. Recently changed to a governance leadership structure – significant tool for next pastor.

 

Still some unresolved longstanding, systemic unhealthy conflict. Mortgage – income that comes in with which they pay the mortgage is usually about $4000 a month short. They use cash reserves right now from the sale of their old building to pay the shortfall but that won’t last forever. Still some division from the conflict last year that is healing but isn’t over.

Warm Weekend

There have been chilly winds and slushy roads, but I had the most wonderfully warm weekend.

Friday evening a good friend and her little girl accompanied Krissy and I as we went to see “A Christmas Carol” performed at our church.  I love that story and the reminder of our God who redeems and gives second chances (and third, fourth, and so on).  On the way home we talked and talked and it filled up my heart.  I’ve missed her.

Saturday evening I met my co-workers at a lovely Italian restaurant on Geist reservoir for our annual Christmas staff dinner.  Wow – delicious.  We went to my boss’ home afterward for some Wii action and goodies.   I then hopped in my car and sped to Anderson to watch my middle girl perform along with lots of other college kids in a musical variety show put on by one of the social clubs about once a quarter.  My oldest and her boyfriend had saved me a seat near the front.  We heard some great music by so many talented (and funny) young people!  When Kaitlin sang my heart swelled.  I know I’m her mother, but she was one of the best of the night.

Sunday morning early my hubby and I got ready and drove to Anderson to pick up our daughters, then headed down the snowy highway Continue reading

TGYWTT

This morning I realized that I forgot Thankful Thursday again!  So instead of TGIF, today I say TGYWTT:  Thank God Yesterday Was Thankful Thursday.

This time I want to thank God for the things I usually think of as negative or unwanted in my life.  I know He uses everything to help us grow, to strengthen us, to keep us humble, to help us remain desperate for Him.  Thanking God even for the awful things you encounter is a way of saying “I trust You, God, and still believe that you’re good.  I believe what you said about causing all things to work together for good.” (Romans 8:28)  Like the Psalmist said in chapter 118, “Thank God because he’s good, because his love never quits.” (The Msg)  I thank God because He’s good and that never changes….so I can always be thankful.

As a follower of Jesus I say that I’m content whatever comes my way because my life belongs to Him and I trust Him.  Can I take it a step further and actually be thankful for the hard stuff that comes my way?  Sometimes I can.  I try to.  I guess that’s what the song means that says “we bring a sacrifice of praise.”  Being thankful can actually feel like sacrifice.   We may not feel thankful but we choose to be.  So here goes… Continue reading

Which makes me think of…

I’m thankful for airplanes that cross miles in such a short time…which makes me think of
Destinations…which makes me think of
Possibility…which makes me think of
New experiences…which makes me think of
Trying something I’ve never eaten before at a restaurant…which makes me think of
The Japanese Grill we visited last week…which makes me think of
Catching scrambled eggs in my mouth in surprise…which makes me think of
Laughter…which makes me think of
All my wonderful friends…which makes me think of
Community…which makes me think of
God’s family of beautiful, diverse, and varied adopted kids…which makes me think of
Being accepted for who I am by Him…which makes me think of
Love and not just surfacy, shallow affection but the deep, wide, and utterly amazing love of God….which makes me thankful all over again.

No whiner babies allowed, including me

complainingcom-plain [kuhm-pleyn]
to express dissatisfaction, pain, uneasiness, censure, resentment, or grief; find fault

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I called my daughter on the carpet last night and confronted her about a complaining attitude, only to have God gently poke me on the shoulder this morning and tell me to heed my own words.  Ow.

My daughter’s not so thrilled with her part-time job and says something about it just about every time she’s about to go there and work.  This week it was getting old to me.  I told her if she was that unhappy with it to just quit, but that she also wouldn’t have a job, or an income, or gas money, or spending money.  I reminded her that there are many less-appealing jobs she could have and to be thankful.  She knows all this stuff but I felt a reminder was in order.

I was thinking more about it as John and I finished our jog/walk this morning in quietness, as the dark blue sky began to lighten and the twinkling stars began to fade out of sight.  The Bible tells us that every good thing comes from God, the Father of light, who never changes like shifting shadows do.  What He gives is good!   So, when my daughter complains about her job, in a way she’s saying, “I don’t like your gift,” or “it’s not good enough” or “I wish you had given me something different.”  We wouldn’t say that to a friend or someone in our family who had just given us a gift – it would be hurtful and ungrateful.  When we complain – an ungrateful attitude is lurking and showing itself.

I looked up the word complain on dictionary.com and found it interesting that the first definition is to “express dissatisfaction.”  Continue reading