Tag Archives: Jesus

I hope God’s not picky

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That’s what a bumper sticker on the car in front of me this morning said.  My heart went out to whoever is thinking and/or wondering that.  Maybe it’s just to be funny but it also sounds like someone who wonders if they’re good enough to get God’s attention.  Is God picky?

If you read about Jesus in the Bible you can clearly see that as far as interacting with and accepting people Jesus was not picky.  In fact, according to some of the religious people of His day He wasn’t picky enough. Continue reading →

Not just bread

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I’ve only been fishing once but would love to learn and try it again sometime.  From what I understand fish pretty much think about one thing: eating.  That’s about the sum of their life, looking for food and eating it.  The problem is there are these humans who toss out lures on fishing lines that dangle and float in the water.  They look like food but inside is a hook that, unbeknownst to the fish, will ensnare it and begin reeling it in to become dinner.

There are lots of lures in this life:  things, people, entertainment, pastimes, hobbies, habits, and more that appear good on the outside but inside is a hook, a trap.  If we bite, it could little by little pull us away from God, from our true purpose, from real and fulfilling life.

I have to admit, I’ve been biting some.  Yesterday in church John brought a great message about Jesus being tempted by satan to turn stone into bread when he was famished and weak.  Jesus saw the hook in satan’s lure and didn’t bite.  Instead He answered back, “Man doesn’t live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from God’s mouth.” (Matthew 4:4)  Bread isn’t a bad thing, but if it were to become the priority over Jesus’ obedience to God and perseverance through testing, it would have pulled him away from his true purpose and mission.

I let busy stuff, facebook, the Internet, messing around, housework, yard work, texting or playing with my phone, and more distract me and fill my day.  Soon it’s time to go to bed and I’ve not cracked open my Bible or spent time just sitting with God in prayer.  I feel empty, restless and frustrated with myself.

God reminded me yesterday in church that I don’t have to bite, that I can resist with His help and stay close to Him.  I can be free and walk the path God has for me without getting pulled this way and that.

So, I’m giving up bread until Easter, just to practice discipline and to remind myself each time I want bread that I don’t live by that alone.  I live by the time I spend with God, by the love and grace He gives me, by my relationship with Him and nearness to Him.  He is my nourishment and sustaining life.  I can’t expect to walk in spiritual health if I only call on Him on Sundays or once a while in “microwave” prayer times.

Yep, it was only our third Sunday at church and the pastor’s wife went to the altar.  Hey, I can be as weak sometimes as the next person even though I don’t want to be.

Papa, remind me of true life, of your purpose for me.  Help me walk in it and walk closer to You.  I crave that more than any other earthly thing.

Just call me Martha

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I imagine she was excited.  Hosting people was something she was quite good at, in fact took pride in.  Friends and family often remarked at her skill in cooking and making guests feel welcome.  Sure, it was a lot of work and took plenty of time preparing, cleaning, toiling away but it was worth it and besides, she’d usually assign her sister to some of the work.

Mary didn’t seem to share Martha’s “passion” for keeping a clean house and preparing delicious meals.  More than once Martha had to snap her fingers to wake Mary from a daydream so she’d get back to her tasks.  There were times she needed help and had to even leave the house to seek Mary out, finding her outside in the garden or sitting beneath a tree looking up at the blue sky.  It wasn’t that Mary was unwilling to help.  It’s just that Martha seemed to have more a little more drive.  She was a go-getter, a “doer.”

Life had taken an unusually happy turn when they met Jesus from Nazareth.  He and his friends joined them around their table more than once to enjoy Mary and Martha’s hospitality and to talk with their brother, Lazarus.  They became good friends.  Jesus seemed to enjoy having a home where he could stop in at times,  Continue reading →

You are more

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define (verb) – 1. to state precisely the meaning of   2. to describe the nature, properties, or essential qualities of   3. to determine the boundary of extent of

Now that it’s been over seven years since I was declared cancer-free, not as many of my current friends know I’m a breast cancer survivor.  It was a big, glaring part of my life in 2003 when I was diagnosed and for several years afterward but then began to fade from the forefront of my thoughts.

I received lots of thoughtful and encouraging notes and cards from friends during my recovery from surgery but one that still stands out in my mind was from a friend I hadn’t heard from in years.  This friend had also battled cancer so her words carried extra weight.  The phrase she wrote that stood out like neon lights was Continue reading →

All together now

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It turns out you need both front tires of your car pointing the same direction if you want to go anywhere.  This morning, Krissy and I were attempting to back out of our parking space to go to school and work when the steering wheel started jiggling.  The car moved erratically and wasn’t doing what I wanted it to.  It veered back and forth and when I tried to drive forward it just sat there, with the steering wheel turning on its own and still jiggling while we began to smell hot rubber.  I hopped out to see what was wrong and saw that the front left tire was facing forward but the front right tire was turned sharply to the right.  Uh oh.  That can’t be good.  We had to get the car towed to the shop because that tire, for whatever reason, wasn’t responding to the steering wheel or the direction I was trying to drive.

I’ve been thinking about change a lot lately, probably because we have some big changes coming up soon for our family.  Even though change happens all around us all the time and is a part of life, we still resist it.  That tendency seems to be built into most people’s core.  We veer toward what is familiar, what we already know, what is comfortable or seems good from past experience.  What if Jesus is turning the steering wheel a different and new direction?  Especially when it comes to teams, families, churches, or other groups who say they have the same goal, all the people have to respond to the direction and turn the same way or no one is going anywhere.  Resisting or being stubborn can cause the whole endeavor to come to a swerving, smelling-like-hot-rubber halt or at least make it a hundred times more difficult for the other “tires” trying to move along.

Our daughter Krissy was a little like our wayward tire when we first started talking about moving a few months ago.  It’s understandable – it wasn’t in her plan, wasn’t her first choice, and didn’t seem comfortable.  Over time, however, I’ve watched as God made needed repairs and adjustments and helped her see that following His lead was the best plan.  Sunday, before John officially accepted the offer to move to another state to pastor a church, we asked her once more how she was feeling and what she was thinking.  She said it would be hard and we agreed with her.  Then she said, with some emotion, “But I feel like God has plans for me there.”  Our hearts swelled.  Our little tire was facing the same way as us again!  Now we can move forward as a family, letting Jesus steer.

If you’re facing changes and feeling resistant, ask God to repair your heart and attitude and help you not be the wayward tire.  You don’t want to hold up what God has in mind for your family, your church, your friends, do you?

Church is like Zumba

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My husband and daughters bought me the most thoughtful gift for Christmas.  They went above and beyond what we all agreed to do, chipped in and got me a set of Zumba DVDs because they know I love it so much.  I hadn’t been able to go to class for several months.  I’ve done a few of the workouts and they’re great, the guy who came up with it is one of the teachers and he’s a lot of fun.  I’m really glad to have them because if I can’t go to class, I can still shake the blues and chub away in our own family room.  Thanks to a surprise from a few of my Zumba buddies, I now have some free classes to use up so I went back this week, Tuesday and tonight.  I have to admit that nothing beats dancing off calories with about 125 other women in a big room with really loud music and fun live teachers.  Just being there with all of them energizes me.  No one is a pro.  Everyone is sweaty.  We all want to have fun, get fit and burn fat.  It’s awesome.

It got me thinking – that’s why I love church.  Not for sweat and burning fat, but for the camaraderie, the energy from being with others who are after the same thing, who love the same God, who want to be healthy and whole not only in their bodies, but mind and soul.  I’ve heard people say they don’t need church.   Continue reading →

Standing by while you hurt

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Someday you’ll understand how much I mean it when I say that when you’re happy, I’m really happy and when you hurt, I hurt.  It’s because I love you so much, more than I could ever make you understand.  But someday when you’re a mom and you have to stand by and watch your child learn through hurt, you’ll know what I mean.

I think of the time your daddy had to stand by and watch you get stitches in your lip.  You didn’t cry much but it wasn’t easy for him to do.  He knew it was for your good so he stood by.  He didn’t get in the way of the doctor or try to prevent it from happening.

I remember the heartbreaking time I had to hold you with both arms on my lap while you squirmed and screamed, as a nurse drew your blood for an important test.  Of course you didn’t understand since you were so young, but I had to because it was going to help you.

You know how it was when we used to plant flowers in front of the house and then water them really well.  Sometimes they were so small and fragile that the water pouring down seemed to flatten them.  However, the next day, Continue reading →

Almost lost the peewee

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I think just about everyone has a story about getting lost.  The scariest and most memorable for our family happened when we lived in New Mexico.  We had taken the girls to the mall and were hanging out a little while in “Tilt”, an arcade.  The girls must have been 2, 4 and 5.  The arcade was one of those that was the size of a store and rather dark filled with all kinds of video games, skeeball, basketball, riding games, etc.  Winning tickets was the goal so we split up and took the girls around to try different games.  I don’t know how or when it happened, but I thought John had Kristine and he thought I had her.  After watching Kimmi play a whack-a-mole game I looked to see where Kristine was.  She wasn’t with us so I looked down the way to where John and Kaitlin were playing.  I didn’t see her there either.  I called out to John and sure enough, he didn’t have her.  I began to panic.  We started calling out her name and rushing around the arcade, looking behind and around all the games, asking anyone we saw if they had seen our little girl.  No one had.  The staff hadn’t seen her but said they’d call security.  All of the sudden nothing mattered but finding her.  I didn’t care who heard me shouting her name or saw me racing around trying to find her.  Then John said, “I’m going out into the mall to see if I can find her.  You stay here.”  So Kimmi, Kaitlin and I knelt down right there in the arcade and prayed.  “God, please.  Please.  Don’t let anything happen to Kristine.  Please help John know where to go.  Please help us find her!”  I couldn’t even cry I was so scared, Continue reading →

Humbled, happy heart

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I sat there listening to her sing her heart in phrases and heard God talk to me, as well, “I’m showing you again that I have the power to influence this young lady’s heart.  I made her, you know.  I have planted more in her than you could dream of or design.  As precious as you are to me, you are not the author of this young one’s soul and faith.  I Am.”

Thank you, God, and forgive me for doubting, worrying or trying to orchestrate.  Thank you for hearing my deepest heart prayers for her (and for all my daughters) – that You would draw her near, that You would comfort her and give her the strength to surrender to you.   You can handle the angry cries, the stubborn thoughts, the questions and more.  You keep painting beauty over those things and then giving me glimpses of this tough and tender work of art that is my daughter.

How I’ve underestimated all my girls at times, in many ways.  Don’t let me do it any more.  Why would I think they are any less complicated, any less deep thinkers and ponderers, any less in tune with God than I am?  Why would I not think You talk to them the way You do me, that You relish every moment they sit with you, read Your word, sing songs to You?  I’m simply a few years farther down the path, but we’re on the same path following You, “I Am”, our incredible Savior and Creator.

We harmonized together on some familiar tunes and I was drawn into worship as I sat in sleepy comfort.  You were sitting right there, Jesus.  The only thing I can do is bow down in my heart, my thankful, peace-filled, humbled heart.

This song will hold more meaning for me from now on:

You stood before creation
Eternity in your hand
You spoke the earth into motion
My soul now to stand

You stood before my failure
And carried the cross for my shame
My sin weighed upon your shoulders
My soul now to stand

So what could I say?
And what could I do?
But offer this heart, Oh God
Completely to you

So I’ll walk upon salvation
Your spirit alive in me
This life to declare your promise
My soul now to stand

So what could I say?
And what could I do?
But offer this heart, Oh God
Completely to you        (© Hillsong United)

Getting healthier after some turmoil last year when pastor left. Facility is really nice and new. Upward basketball – 200+ kids. Pretty good sense of mission, awareness of the need to be missional. Recently changed to a governance leadership structure – significant tool for next pastor.

 

Still some unresolved longstanding, systemic unhealthy conflict. Mortgage – income that comes in with which they pay the mortgage is usually about $4000 a month short. They use cash reserves right now from the sale of their old building to pay the shortfall but that won’t last forever. Still some division from the conflict last year that is healing but isn’t over.

A quick look back, then we face the dawn

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I believe in pressing forward and in living in this day but once in a while it’s good to take a quick look back to see how far we’ve come and remember what we learned.  A friend of mine said today that looking toward this new year is like throwing out a fishing line, we wait and watch to see what we’ll reel in, not knowing, but hoping.  I joked that it’s probably good we can’t see all that we’re going to “reel in” this coming year and that I’m glad Jesus is there to help us if we have to pull in something really heavy or menacing.  Today I’ve been thinking some about the lessons I caught in 2010.  Some of them were whoppers: Continue reading →